Some Parenting Tips

Attended some parenting talks organised by PLMGS (Primary) during Joann's first week in Primary 1. I found the talks helpful and wish to share some key take-aways from the sessions:

Good Manners

Teaching good manners is a fundamental aspect of parenting as it's every parent's wish for their children to be well-liked by people. However as parents, we must remember that good manners start with parents as our children watch our behaviours and actions.  

Another good point to note, is that we should also learn to praise our children whenever a positive behavior is displayed, rather than overly focusing on correcting their negative behaviors. Let's cultivate good manners in our children by adopting a balanced approach.

Cultivating a Habit of Reading

The speaker stressed on the importance of cultivating the love for reading in young children. Besides the advantage of gaining knowledge from reading, a reading habit creates the opportunities for parents to bond with the children, stretch their imaginations and train their concentration. Here are some tips to make reading more interesting and captivating for the young minds:

(a) Start with a storybook with a topic that interests your child. For Joann, we started with her favorite princess stories. For Jayden, we started off with books on race cars.

(b) Start by talking about the pictures in the storybook, to draw the child's attention. This is why storybooks for children, always come with colorful pictures. Then, read the storybook as well as point to the words so that your child will gradually learn to identify the text.

(c) When reading the storybook to your child, parent should vary his/her voice, preferrably in accordance with the story characters, to make it more interesting.

(d) After reading the book, you can discuss about the story with your child i.e. talk about his favorite character, the most exciting part, etc

(e) Keep the story reading time short and regular. A reading routine like reading before bed-time daily, will go a long way to cultivate a habit in your child. Choose a routine that best fits you and your children. 

 

(f) Remove distractions such as TV, computer games, radio, etc operating in the background, during reading time.

Parenting Journey - Serving as a Role Model

A phrase from a book by John Bevere, “Extraordinary” caught my attention and gave some food for thought concerning parenting.

“The parents tell their children to do things they themselves don’t do, or they tell them to not do things they do. Many parents tell their children not to fight; yet they regularly fight before them. Then the parents wonder why their children fight."

This phrase caught my attention as it reminded me of the principle, “Do to others as you would have them do to you” (Luke 6:31). I am reminded of the occasions where I raised my voice or spoke harshly to my children when they were disobedient. These are the emotional moments that I thought I could have done better. I am reminded that our children pick up the habits and manners from us, parents. Hence, the way we relate to our children emotionally and intellectually is especially crucial during their formative years. We are setting the examples for them.

To do these consistently is never easy especially when you could be emotionally drained after a long day at work. Thus, I want to constantly remind myself that I need to:

  

(1) ensure reserve in my emotion bank daily when I return home

(2) know that my children will make mistakes and need my guidance regularly, just like you and I even when we are adults

(3)  know that frustration will breed more frustrations while patience and love serve as the platform for positive growth in my children

For me, parenting is not just a journey of knowing my children and molding their characters, it is also a precious journey filled with self-discovery for me – a deeper awareness of my strengths and weaknesses. I have certainly learnt a lot about myself since I became a parent. Besides my children, I am sure that God is also molding me through this journey.